was a difficulty almost or quite insurmountable. My
father had always said he would endorse for nobody. And as for asking
any one else to endorse for me, I dared not.

But I cannot dwell at this point. My father at length became my
endorser, and the bargain was signed and sealed. It was indeed, a
desperate effort, and I have a thousand times wondered how I could have
ventured. Why! only one or two years before, I was miserable for several
days because I was in debt to the extent of only two dollars for a
much-needed article, and actually procured the money with considerable
difficulty, and went and paid the debt to get rid of my anguish; whereas
now, without much pain and without being worth fifty dollars in the
world, I could be willing to contract a debt of from twelve to fifteen
hundred dollars, and involve my good old father in the consequences
besides. How entirely unaccountable!

But mankind love life, and fear death. The scheme proposed was, as I
believed, not only a dernier but a needful resort. It was a wrong step
no doubt, but I did not then think so. I believed the end "sanctified"
or at least sanctioned the means. How could I have done so? "What
ardently we wish, we soon believe." I had most ardently wished, I now
began to believe!

My consumptive tendencies now receded apace, even before I was astride
of my horse. The stimulus of the hope of life with a forgetfulness of
myself, were better tonics than Huxham or ale or rich food. There was
the expectation of living, and consequently the beginning of life. Mind
has great power over even inert matter; how much more over the living
animated machine!

CHAPTER XXIV.

MY JOURNEYMANSHIP IN MEDICINE.

Journeymen in medicine, though without the full responsibilities of the
profession, have yet their difficulties. I had mine; and I had not only
the ordinary complement of ordinary men, but some which were a little
extra.

For example, I was no horseman at all, and people around me knew it. At
the first attempt to mount a new horse, and ride out with the old
physician, of whom I had purchased my stand, to see his patients, I made
an exhibition of my horsemanship which I shall not soon forget, and
which I am sure certain wags and half-buffoons and common loungers who
witnessed the scene _never_ will.

My horse stood at the post all caparisoned, while I made ready. In
setting off, I knew well I must submit to the ordeal of being gazed at
and commented o