gentleman, sir!"

"Kind of you, Brimberly, but I know myself for an absolutely useless
thing--a purposeless, ambitionless wretch, drifting on to God knows
what. I'm a hopeless wreck, a moral derelict, and it has only occurred
to me to-night--but"--and here the speaker paused to flick the ash from
his cigar--"I fear I'm boring you?"

"No, sir--ho, no, not at all, indeed, sir!"

"You're very kind, Brimberly--light a cigarette! Ah, no, pardon me, you
prefer my cigars, I know."

"Why--why, sir--" stammered Mr. Brimberly, laying a soothing hand upon
his twitching whisker, "indeed, I--I--"

"Oh--help yourself, pray!"

Hereupon Mr. Brimberly took a cigar very much at random, and, while
Young R. watched with lazy interest, proceeded to cut it--though with
singularly clumsy fingers.

"A light, Mr. Brimberly--allow me!"

So Ravenslee held the light while Mr. Brimberly puffed his cigar to a
glow, though to be sure he coughed once and choked, as he met Young R.'s
calm grey eye.

"Now," pursued his master, "if you're quite comfortable, Mr. Brimberly,
perhaps you'll be good enough to--er--hearken further to my tale of
woe?"

Mr. Brimberly choked again and recovering, smoothed his writhing
whiskers and murmured: "It would be a honour!"

"First, then, Brimberly, have you ever hated yourself--I mean, despised
yourself so utterly and thoroughly that the bare idea of your existence
makes you angry and indignant?"

"Why--no, sir," answered Mr. Brimberly, staring, "I can't say as I 'ave,
sir."

"No," said his master with another keen glance, "and I don't suppose you
ever will!" Now here again, perhaps because of the look or something in
Young R.'s tone, Mr. Brimberly took occasion to emit a small, apologetic
cough.

"You have never felt yourself to be a--cumberer of the earth, Brimberly?"

Mr. Brimberly, having thought the matter over, decided that he had not.

"You are not given to introspection, Brimberly?"

"Intro--ahem! No, sir, not precisely--'ardly that, sir, and then only
very occasional, sir!"

"Then you've never got on to yourself--got wise to yourself--seen
yourself as you really are?"

Mr. Brimberly goggled and groped for his whisker.

"I mean," pursued his master, "you have never seen all your secret
weaknesses and petty meannesses stripped stark naked, have you?"

"N-naked, sir!" faltered Mr. Brimberly, "very distressing indeed,
sir--oh, dear me!"

"It's a devilish unpleasant thing," continued Youn