cost the
Government fourteen pounds sterling every time we fined Terry, the
cobbler, five shillings for being drunk; and Terry did not always pay
the fines. What ails British law is dignity, and the insufferable
expense attending it. The disease will never be cured until a
strong-minded Chief Justice shall be found, who has sense enough to
sit on the bench in his native hair, and to take off his coat when
the thermometer rises to eighty degrees. It was in that manner Judge
Winstanley kept court at Waterloo in Illinois, and we had there
quicker justice, cheaper laws, and better manners than those which
this southern hemisphere yet exhibits. As to the lawyers, if we did
not like them, we could lynch them, so they were sociable and civil.
Moreover, Prairie de Long was discovered and settled nearly twenty
years before Australia Felix was heard of.

The three villages had a life-long feud with, and a consuming
jealousy of, each other. Until my arrival I was not aware that there
were three such places as Palmerston, Alberton, and Tarraville,
claiming separate and rival existences. I had a notion that they
were merely straggling suburbs of the great city and seaport, Port
Albert. But it was a grievous mistake. I asked a tall young lady at
the hotel, who brought in some very salt fish that took the skin off
the roof of my mouth, if she could recommend the society of these
villages, and if she would favour me with her opinion as to which
would be the best place to select as a residence, and she said, "The
people there are an 'orrid lot." This was very discouraging; but, on
making further enquiries, I found she only expressed the opinion
which the inhabitants of these centres of population held of each
other; and it was evident that I should have to demean myself with
prudence, and show no particular affection for one place more than
for another, or trouble would ensue. Therefore, as soon as occasion
offered, I took a house and paddock within easy distance of all the
three corners, so that when the Government allowance had reduced my
horse to a skeleton, I might give him a spell on grass, and travel to
the courts on foot. The house was on a gentle rise, overlooking a
rich river flat. It had been built by a retainer of Lord Glengarry,
who had declined to follow any further the fortunes of his chief when
he had closed his dairying operations at Greenmount. A tragedy had
been enacted in it some years before, and a ghos