us soon fell asleep. Paulus sat
near him and did not stir; he held his breath, and painfully suppressed
even an impulse to cough, so as not to disturb the sick man's light
slumbers.

An hour after midnight the old man awoke, and after he had lain
meditating for some time with his eyes open, he said thoughtfully: "You
called yourself and us all egotistic, and I certainly am so. I have
often said so to myself; not for the first time to day, but for
weeks past, since Hermas came back from Alexandria, and seems to have
forgotten how to laugh. He is not happy, and when I ask myself what is
to become of him when I am dead, and if he turns from the Lord and seeks
the pleasures of the world, my heart sickens. I meant it for the best
when I brought him with me up to the Holy Mountain, but that was not the
only motive--it seemed to me too hard to part altogether from the child.
My God! the young of brutes are secure of their mother's faithful
love, and his never asked for him when she fled from my house with her
seducer. I thought he should at least not lose his father, and that if
he grew up far away from the world he would be spared all the sorrow
that it had so profusely heaped upon me, I would have brought him up
fit for Heaven, and yet through a life devoid of suffering. And now--and
now? If he is miserable it will be through me, and added to all my other
troubles comes this grief."

"You have sought out the way for him," interrupted Paulus, "and the rest
will be sure to come; he loves you and will certainly not leave you so
long as you are suffering."

"Certainly not?" asked the sick man sadly. "And what weapons has he to
fight through life with?"

"You gave him the Saviour for a guide; that is enough," said Paulus
soothingly. "There is no smooth road from earth to Heaven, and none can
win salvation for another."

Stephanus was silent for a long time, then he said: "It is not even
allowed to a father to earn the wretched experience of life for his son,
or to a teacher for his pupil. We may point out the goal, but the way
thither is by a different road for each of us."

"And we may thank God for that," cried Paulus. "For Hermas has been
started on the road which you and I had first to find for ourselves."

"You and I," repeated the sick man thoughtfully. "Yes, each of us has
sought his own way, but has enquired only which was his own way, and has
never concerned himself about that of the other. Self! self!--How many