ke letters of fire, and she
turned her face to the pillow as it were to hide from them, as well as
to stifle the groans that could not have been wrung from her by bodily
pain. 'Oh, my sin has found me out! I thought I had been punished,
but these are the very dregs! His blood is on my head! My brother! my
brother! whom I loved above all! He was learning to love his home and
children; she was weaning him from those pursuits! What might he not
have been? I led him away! When he shrank from the temptation, I dragged
him to it! I gave him back to the tempter! I, who thought I loved him--I
did the devil's work! Oh! this is the heavier weight! Why should it
crush others with the only guilty one? Oh! have mercy, have mercy on
him! Let me bear all! Take me instead! Let me not have slain his soul!'

It was anguish beyond the power of words. She could not lie still; she
knelt on the floor, and there the flood of despair fell on her more
overwhelmingly; and crouching, almost cast on the ground, she poured out
incoherent entreaties for mercy, for space for his repentance, for his
forgiveness. That agony of distracted prayer must have lasted a long
time. Some sound in her brother's room alarmed her, and in starting she
shook the table. Her father came to ask if anything was the matter; told
her that Arthur was quiet, and begged her to lie down. It was a relief
to have something to obey, and she moved back. The light gleamed on
something bright. It was the setting of Helen's cross! 'Ah! I was not
worthy to save it; that was for Johnnie's innocent hand! I may not call
this my cross, but my rod!' Then came one thought: 'I came not for the
righteous, but to call sinners to repentance.' Therewith hot tears rose
up. 'With Him there is infinite mercy and redemption.' Some power of
hope revived, that Mercy might give time to repent, accept the heartfelt
grief that might exist, though not manifested to man! The hope, the
motive, and comfort in praying, had gleamed across her again; and not
with utter despair could she beseech that the sins she had almost caused
might be so repented of as to receive the pardon sufficient for all
iniquity.

CHAPTER 10

Thus have I seen a temper wild
In yokes of strong affection bound
Unto a spirit meek and mild,
Till chains of good were on him found.
He, struggling in his deep distress,
As in some dream of loneliness,
Hath found it was an angel guest.