f the day when we ourselves shall be blown up with
dynamite."

THE COLONEL'S IDEAS

"Upon my word," said Colonel Laporte, "I am old and gouty, my legs are
as stiff as two sticks, and yet if a pretty woman were to tell me to go
through the eye of a needle, I believe I should take a jump at it, like
a clown through a hoop. I shall die like that; it is in the blood. I am
an old beau, one of the old regime, and the sight of a woman, a pretty
woman, stirs me to the tips of my toes. There!

"And then we are all very much alike in France; we remain cavaliers,
cavaliers of love and fortune, since God has been abolished, whose
bodyguard we really were. But nobody will ever get the woman out of our
hearts; there she is, and there she will remain; we love her, and shall
continue to love her, and to commit all kinds of frolics on her
account, so long as there is a France on the map of Europe. And even if
France were to be wiped off the map, there would always be Frenchmen
left.

"When I am in the presence of a woman, of a pretty woman, I feel
capable of anything. By Jove, when I feel her looks penetrating me,
those confounded looks which set your blood on fire, I could do
anything: fight a duel, have a row, smash the furniture, anything just
to show that I am the strongest, the bravest, the most daring, and the
most devoted of men.

"But I am not the only one--certainly not; the whole French army is
like me, that I will swear to. From the common soldier to the general,
we all go forward, and to the very end, mark you, when there is a woman
in the case, a pretty woman. Remember what Joan of Arc made us do
formerly! Come, I'd make a bet that if a pretty woman had taken command
of the army on the eve of Sedan, when Marshal MacMahon was wounded, we
should have broken through the Prussian lines, by Jove! and have had a
drink out of their guns.

"It was not Trochu, but Saint Genevieve, who was required in Paris, and
I remember a little anecdote of the war which proves that we are
capable of everything in the presence of a woman.

"I was a captain, a simple captain, at the time, and was in command of
a detachment of scouts who were retreating through a district swarming
with Prussians. We were surrounded, pursued, tired out, and half dead
with fatigue and hunger, and by the next day we had to reach
Bar-sur-Tain; otherwise we should be done for, cut off from the main
body and killed. I do not know how we managed to escape so f