-in her own eyes, and also in the eyes of her
neighbours. She would have to confess herself in the wrong. Everyone
knew that she had just raised Socknersh's wages, so there would be no
good pretending that she had known his shortcomings from the first, but
had put up with them as long as she could. Everyone would guess that
something had happened to make her change her mind about him ... there
would be some terrible talk at the Woolpack.

And there was Socknersh himself, poor fellow--the martyr of her
impulses. She thrust her face deep into the pillow when she thought of
him. She had given him as sharp a blow as his thick hide would ever let
him suffer. She would never forget that last look on his face....

Then she began wondering why this should have come upon her. Why should
she have made a fool of herself over Socknersh, when she had borne
unmoved the courtship of Arthur Alce for seven years? Was it just
because Alce had red whiskers and red hands and red hair on his hands,
while Socknersh was dark and sweet of face and limb? It was terrible to
think that mere youth and comeliness and virility should blind her
judgment and strip her of common sense. Yet this was obviously the
lesson she must learn from to-day's disgrace.

Hot and tear-stained, she climbed out of bed, and paced across the dark
room to the grey blot of the window. She forgot her distrust of the
night air in all her misery of throbbing head and heart, and flung back
the casement, so that the soft marsh wind came in, with rain upon it,
and her tears were mingled with the tears of the night.

"Oh God!" she mourned to herself--"why didn't you make me a man?"

_PART II_

FIRST LOVE

Sec.1

It took Joanna nearly two years to recover from the losses of her sheep.
Some people would have done it earlier, but she was not a clever
economist. Where many women on the Marsh would have thrown themselves
into an orgy of retrenchment--ranging from the dismissal of a dairymaid
to the substitution of a cheaper brand of tea--she made no new occasions
for thrift, and persevered but lamely in the old ones. She was fond of
spending--liked to see things trim and bright; she hated waste,
especially when others were guilty of it, but she found a positive
support in display.

She was also generous. Everybody knew that she had paid Dick Socknersh
thirty shillings for the two weeks that he was out of work after leaving
her--before he went as cattleman t