young then to reflect on the conduct of the count; but I have
since thought that his abandonment of me was an act of delicacy on his
part, as he did not wish to make me an emigre without the consent of my
parents. I have always believed that, before his departure, the count
had committed me to the care of some one, who subsequently did not dare
to claim me, lest he should compromise himself, which was then, as is
well known, exceedingly dangerous. Behold me, then, at twelve years of
age, left without a guide, without means of support, without any one to
advise me, and without money, more than a hundred leagues from my home,
and already accustomed to the comforts of a luxurious life. It is hardly
credible that in this state of affairs I was regarded almost as a
suspect, and was required each day to present myself before the city
authorities for the greater safety of the Republic. I remember well that
whenever the Emperor was pleased to make me relate these tribulations of
my childhood, he never failed to repeat several times, "the fools,"
referring to these same city authorities. However that may be, the
authorities of Tours, coming to the conclusion, at last, that a child of
twelve was incapable of overthrowing the Republic, gave me a passport,
with the injunction to leave the city within twenty-four hours, which I
proceeded to do with a hearty good-will, but not without deep grief also
at seeing myself alone, and on foot, with a long journey before me.
After much privation and many hardships I arrived at last in the
neighborhood of Saint-Amand, which I found in the possession of the
Austrians, and that it was impossible for me to reach the town, as the
French surrounded it. In my despair I seated myself on the side of a
ditch and was weeping bitterly, when I was noticed by the chief of
squadron, Michau,

[I afterwards had the happiness of obtaining for him, from the
Emperor, a position he wished, as a place of retirement, having lost
the use of his right arm.--CONSTANT.]

who afterwards became colonel and aide-de-camp to General Loison. Michau
approached me, questioned me with great interest, and made me relate my
sad adventures, which touched him deeply, while he did not conceal his
inability to send me back to my family. He had just obtained leave of
absence, which he was going to spend with his family at Chinon, and
proposed to me to accompany him, which invitation I accepted with
gratitude. I cannot say t