a
chimney-corner, we should know more of the Tyrol than we'll ever acquire
junketing along in a hired coach, and only eager not to pay too much
for one's 'Kalbsbraten' or 'Schweinfleisch,' and yet here we come in
shoals,--to grumble and complain of all our self-imposed miseries, and
incessantly lament the comforts of the land that we won't live in."

"Some of us come for health," said Loyd, sorrowfully.

"And was there ever such a blunder? Why the very vicissitudes of a
continental climate are more trying than any severity in our own.
Imagine the room we are now sitting in, of a winter's evening, with a
stove heated to ninety-five, and the door opening every five minutes to
a draught of air eleven degrees below zero! You pass out of this furnace
to your bed-room, by a stair and corridor like the Arctic regions, to
gain an uncarpeted room, with something like a knife-tray for a bed, and
a poultice of feathers for a coverlet!"

"And for all that we like it, we long for it; save, pinch, screw, and
sacrifice Heaven knows what of home enjoyment just for six weeks or two
months of it."

"Shall I tell you why? Just because Simpkins has done it Simpkins has
been up the Rhine and dined at the Cursaal at Ems, and made his little
debut at roulette at Wiesbaden, and spoken his atrocious French at
Frankfort, and we won't consent to be less men of the world than
Simpkins; and though Simpkins knows that it doesn't 'pay,' and _I_
know that it doesn't pay, we won't 'peach' either of us, just for
the pleasure of seeing you, and a score like you, fall into the
same blunder, experience the same disasters, and incur the same
disappointments as ourselves."

"No. I don't agree with you; or, rather, I won't agree with you. I am
determined to enjoy this holiday of mine to the utmost my health will
let me, and you shall not poison the pleasure by that false philosophy
which, affecting to be deep, is only depreciatory."

"And the honourable gentleman resumed his seat, as the newspapers say,
amidst loud and vociferous cheers, which lasted for several minutes."
This Calvert said as he drummed a noisy applause upon the table, and
made Loyd's face glow with a blush of deep shame and confusion.

"I told you, the second day we travelled together, and I tell you again
now, Calvert," said he, falteringly, "that we are nowise suited to each
other, and never could make good travelling companions. You know far
more of life than I either do or wish t