f a noble spirit, and there was a dignity in her grief
amidst all the wildness of her transport, which, methought, struck me
with an instinct of sorrow, which, before I was sensible of what it was
to grieve, seized my very soul, and has made pity the weakness of my
heart ever since. The mind in infancy is, methinks, like the body in
embryo, and receives impressions so forcible, that they are as hard to
be removed by reason, as any mark with which a child is born is to be
taken away by any future application. Hence it is, that good nature in
me is no merit; but having been so frequently overwhelmed with her tears
before I knew the cause of any affliction, or could draw defences from
my own judgment, I imbibed commiseration, remorse, and an unmanly
gentleness of mind, which has since ensnared me into ten thousand
calamities, and from whence I can reap no advantage, except it be, that
in such a humour as I am now in, I can the better indulge myself in the
softnesses of humanity, and enjoy that sweet anxiety which arises from
the memory of past afflictions.[300]

We that are very old, are better able to remember things which befell us
in our distant youth, than the passages of later days. For this reason
it is, that the companions of my strong and vigorous years present
themselves more immediately to me in this office of sorrow. Untimely or
unhappy deaths are what we are most apt to lament, so little are we able
to make it indifferent when a thing happens, though we know it must
happen. Thus we groan under life, and bewail those who are relieved from
it. Every object that returns to our imagination raises different
passions according to the circumstance of their departure. Who can have
lived in an army, and in a serious hour reflect upon the many gay and
agreeable men that might long have flourished in the arts of peace, and
not join with the imprecations of the fatherless and widow on the tyrant
to whose ambition they fell sacrifices? But gallant men, who are cut off
by the sword, move rather our veneration than our pity, and we gather
relief enough from their own contempt of death, to make it no evil,
which was approached with so much cheerfulness, and attended with so
much honour. But when we turn our thoughts from the great parts of life
on such occasions, and instead of lamenting those who stood ready to
give death to those from whom they had the fortune to receive it; I say,
when we let our thoughts wander from such no