rs of the fair sex; we are delighted to see that so many have come
to grace our gathering on this occasion; we realize that a woman's
intuition is ofttimes truer than a man's reasoning, and although women
have no actual voice in politics, they have something far more strong
and potent--they have the wonder power of indirect influence." Just
about here comes in "the hand that rocks!"

Having thus administered the dope, in this pleasing mixture of molasses
and soft soap, which is supposed to keep the "fair sex" quiet and happy
for the balance of the evening, the aspirant for public honors passes
on to the serious business of the hour, and discusses the affairs of
state with the electorate. Right here, let us sound a small note of
warning. Keep your eye on the man who refers to women as the "fair
sex"--he is a dealer in dope!

One of the oldest and falsest of our beliefs regarding women is that
they are protected--that some way in the battle of life they get the
best of it. People talk of men's chivalry, that vague, indefinite
quality which is supposed to transmute the common clay of life into
gold.

Chivalry is a magic word. It seems to breathe of foreign strands and
moonlight groves and silver sands and knights and earls and kings; it
seems to tell of glorious deeds and waving plumes and prancing steeds
and belted earls--and things!

People tell us of the good old days of chivalry when womanhood was
really respected and reverenced--when brave knight rode gaily forth to
die for his lady love. But in order to be really loved and respected
there was one hard and fast condition laid down, to which all women
must conform--they must be beautiful, no getting out of that. They
simply had to have starry eyes and golden hair, or else black as a
raven's wing; they had to have pale, white, and haughty brow, and a
laugh like a ripple of magic. Then they were all right and armored
knights would die for them quick as wink!

The homely women were all witches, dreadful witches, and they drowned
them, on public holidays, in the mill pond!

People tell us now that chivalry is dead, and women have killed it,
bold women who instead of staying at home, broidering pearls on a red
velvet sleeve, have gone out to work--have gone to college side by side
with men and have been so unwomanly sometimes as to take the prizes
away from men. Chivalry cannot live in such an atmosphere. Certainly
not!

Of course women can hardly be blam