ps: to them it is the type which counts, the
_forma specifica per formam individualem translucens_, of which the
scholastic jargon speaks. Those with whom I come in casual contact
appear to me now in a vague, diffused light like the atmosphere of some
other world. Dwelling upon none with the eyes of intimacy, and passing
swiftly from this to that, I find each but the harmless variant of a
species; if I lingered or came too near, doubtless old apprehensions
would oppress me still. It is a disadvantage of this outlook that the
fascination of detail is lost, and that I have less sense for the
personal in life. But if I grow old I shall regain the interest in
particular things and persons with which age is consoled amid many
miseries; for while youth grows earnest over some riddle of high art or
the occultation of Aldebaran, age is happily absorbed in the arrangement
of a room or discussing the destinies of a single household.

Meanwhile, though uncongenial to my kind as entering little into their
pleasures, I like to be near them in their grief or happiness, standing
unnoticed in the wind of their fortune's wheel. At least I am not soured
or malevolent, and when there is dancing toward, I am in the crowd upon
the margin of the green. I have abandoned social obligations because I
am unfitted to perform them well, and society high and low exists by
their cheerful fulfilment. But I no longer rail at social law or decline
to see anything but evil in conventions devised by the wisdom and
refinement of centuries. If I refuse invitations and leave calls unpaid,
it is because I am socially bankrupt: were I solvent I should redeem all
debts.

I decline therefore to denounce Chesterfield and deify Thoreau: there
was exaggeration in both men, and though my sympathies are rather with
the recluse of Walden pond, it is quite probable that Chesterfield was
the more useful of the two. I am a bad player, I have not the high
spirits or the conversational skill which each should contribute to the
social game. And in almost any sport the incompetent confer a benefit by
standing out: at least, that is the opinion which I hear the average
player express. If I lived in the backwoods where any guest is welcome,
it might be my duty to act differently. But my ways are cast in places
where there is no need for social press-gangs, and the highways and
hedges are left unsearched. If therefore by abstention I gain a
qualified peace for myself, and con