deficiency anywhere it comes out of her pleasure. Her
burdens are everywhere. Look for them, that you may lighten them.

5. MAKE YOURSELF HELPFUL BY THOUGHTFULNESS.--Remember to bring into
the house your best smile and sunshine. It is good for you, and it
cheers up the home. There is hardly a nook in the house that has not
been carefully hunted through to drive out everything that might annoy
you. The dinner which suits, or ought to suit you, has not come on the
table of itself. It represents much thoughtfulness and work. You can
do no more manly thing than find some way of expressing, in word or
look, your appreciation of it.

6. EXPRESS YOUR WILL, NOT BY COMMANDS, BUT BY SUGGESTIONS.--It is
God's order that you should be the head of the family. You are clothed
with authority. But this does not authorize you to be stern and harsh,
as an officer in the army. Your authority is the dignity of love.
When it is not clothed in love it ceases to have the substance of
authority. A simple suggestion that may embody a wish, an opinion or
an argument, becomes one who reigns over such a kingdom as yours.

7. SEEK TO REFINE YOUR NATURE.--It is no slander to say that many men
have wives much more refined than themselves. This is natural in the
inequalities of life. Other qualities may compensate for any defect
here. But you need have no defect in refinement. Preserve the
gentleness and refinement of your wife as a rich legacy for your
children, and in so doing you will lift yourself to higher levels.

8. BE A GENTLEMAN AS WELL AS A HUSBAND.--The signs and bronze and
callouses of toil are no indications that you are not a gentleman.
The soul of gentlemanliness is a kindly feeling toward others, that
prompts one to secure their comfort. That is why the thoughtful
peasant lover is always so gentlemanly, and in his love much above
himself.

9. STAY AT HOME.--Habitual absence during the evenings is sure to
bring sorrow. If your duty or business calls you you have the promise
that you will be kept in all your ways. But if you go out to mingle
with other society, and leave your wife at home alone, or with the
children and servants, know that there is no good in store for you.
She has claims upon you that you can not afford to allow to go to
protest. Reverse the case. You sit down alone after having waited
all day for your wife's return, and think of her as reveling in gay
society, and see if you can keep out all the doubts as to what