the perils of Hell Gate."

CHAPTER XXVIII.

"Then lock thee fast
Alone within thy chamber, there fall down
On both thy knees, and grovel on the ground:
Cry to thy heart: wash every word thou utter'st
In tears (and if't be possible) of blood:
Beg Heaven to cleanse the leprosy."

FORD'S PLAYS.

Armstrong, upon the departure of Holden, sat moodily pondering what
had been told him. Were his emotions those of pleasure or of pain? At
first, the former. The natural goodness of his disposition made
him instinctively rejoice in the happiness of his friend. For a few
moments, he forgot himself, and, as long as the forgetfulness lasted,
was happy in the participation of the other's hopes. But this frame
of mind was only momentary. We have seen how an answer of Holden was
sufficient to restore his gloom. Thoughts chased each other in wild
confusion, over which he had no control, which he reproached himself
for admitting--which he would have excluded, if he could. The
connection between him and the Solitary was one of mutual misfortune.
Sorrow was the ligament that united them. For years had he known
Holden, but it was only within a short time, namely, since an awakened
conscience (so he judged, himself) had revealed to him his own
hideousness, that he had been attracted to the Solitary. Should Holden
recover his son, should his heart expand once more to admit worldly
joys, would it not be closed to him? As he once felt indifference
towards Holden, so would not Holden, by a change of circumstances,
by the awakening of new desires and new hopes, by the occupancy
of emotions the more delightful because fresh and for so long
unexperienced, stand to him in other and colder relations? These
reflections were not clear, distinct, sharply defined. They drove
through his mind, ragged and torn, like storm-clouds chased by the
tempest.

There were two beings struggling with one another in him--the one
striving to encourage the noble feelings of his nature, and drive away
whatever was inconsistent with truth and reason--the other whispering
doubt, and selfishness, and despair. He rose and paced, with rapid
steps, the room.

"Has it come to this?" he said to himself, as if wondering at his
condition. "Am I become incapable of participating in the happiness of
others? Am I a festering mass of selfishness? O! once it was not so.
I will resist these thoughts which come from the bottomless pit.