, "Sure and I knows every rock in the channel."

That moment, "bang" thumped the vessel against a rock.

"Ah! be-jabers, and that is one of 'em," continued the pilot. But
to return to the dining-room. "Pat," said the landlord, "here we do
everything systematically. You must first give the gentlemen each a
plate of soup, and when they finish that, ask them what they will have
next."

Pat replied, "Ah! an' I understand parfectly the vartues of shystem."

Very soon in came the guests. The plates of soup were placed before
them. One of Pat's two gentlemen ate his soup; the other did not care
for it. He said: "Waiter, take this plate away and bring me some
fish." Pat looked at the untasted plate of soup, and remembering the
instructions of the landlord in regard to "system," replied: "Not till
ye have ate yer supe!"

Of course that was carrying "system" entirely too far.

READ THE NEWSPAPERS

Always take a trustworthy newspaper, and thus keep thoroughly posted in
regard to the transactions of the world. He who is without a newspaper
is cut off from his species. In these days of telegraphs and steam, many
important inventions and improvements in every branch of trade are being
made, and he who don't consult the newspapers will soon find himself and
his business left out in the cold.

BEWARE OF "OUTSIDE OPERATIONS"

We sometimes see men who have obtained fortunes, suddenly become poor.
In many cases, this arises from intemperance, and often from gaming, and
other bad habits. Frequently it occurs because a man has been engaged in
"outside operations," of some sort. When he gets rich in his legitimate
business, he is told of a grand speculation where he can make a score of
thousands. He is constantly flattered by his friends, who tell him that
he is born lucky, that everything he touches turns into gold. Now if
he forgets that his economical habits, his rectitude of conduct and a
personal attention to a business which he understood, caused his success
in life, he will listen to the siren voices. He says:

"I will put in twenty thousand dollars. I have been lucky, and my good
luck will soon bring me back sixty thousand dollars."

A few days elapse and it is discovered he must put in ten thousand
dollars more: soon after he is told "it is all right," but certain
matters not foreseen, require an advance of twenty thousand dollars
more, which will bring him a rich harvest; but before the time comes
around to