omplished as the first, my
sufferings are far from being at an end.

It was thus I learned after having been so many years treated for
disorders which I never had, that my incurable disease, without being
mortal, would last as long as myself. My imagination, repressed by this
information, no longer presented to me in prospective a cruel death in
the agonies of the stone.

Delivered from imaginary evils, more cruel to me than those which were
real, I more patiently suffered the latter. It is certain I have since
suffered less from my disorder than I had done before, and every time I
recollect that I owe this alleviation to M. de Luxembourg, his memory
becomes more dear to me.

Restored, as I may say, to life, and more than ever occupied with the
plan according to which I was determined to pass the rest of my days, all
the obstacle to the immediate execution of my design was the publication
of 'Emilius'. I thought of Touraine where I had already been and which
pleased me much, as well on account of the mildness of the climate, as on
that of the character of the inhabitants.

'La terra molle lieta a dilettosa
Simile a se l'habitator produce.'

I had already spoken of my project to M. de Luxembourg, who endeavored to
dissuade me from it; I mentioned it to him a second time as a thing
resolved upon. He then offered me the castle of Merlon, fifteen leagues
from Paris, as an asylum which might be agreeable to me, and where he and
Madam de Luxembourg would have a real pleasure in seeing me settled. The
proposition made a pleasing impression on my mind. But the first thing
necessary was to see the place, and we agreed upon a day when the
marechal was to send his valet de chambre with a carriage to take me to
it. On the day appointed, I was much indisposed; the journey was
postponed, and different circumstances prevented me from ever making it.
I have since learned the estate of Merlou did not belong to the marechal
but to his lady, on which account I was the less sorry I had not gone to
live there.

'Emilius' was at length given to the public, without my having heard
further of retrenchments or difficulties. Previous to the publication,
the marechal asked me for all the letters M. de Malesherbes had written
to me on the subject of the work. My great confidence in both, and the
perfect security in which I felt myself, prevented me from reflecting
upon this extraordinary and ev