our lover for me,
since I had innocently shewed you his portrait, and happy in the idea
that you were not jealous of me, I would have despised myself if I had
entertained any feelings different from your own, the more so that your
rights over him were by far stronger than mine. As for the mysterious
manner in which you always kept from me the name of your husband, I
easily guessed that you were only obeying his orders, and I admired your
noble sentiments and the goodness of your heart. In my opinion your lover
was afraid of losing us both, if we found out that neither the one nor
the other of us possessed his whole heart. I could not express my deep
sorrow when I thought that, after you had seen me in possession of his
portrait, you continued to act in the same manner towards me, although
you could not any longer hope to be the sole object of his love. Then I
had but one idea; to prove to both of you that M---- M---- is worthy of
your affection, of your friendship, of your esteem. I was indeed
thoroughly happy when I thought that the felicity of our trio would be
increased a hundredfold, for is it not an unbearable misery to keep a
secret from the being we adore? I made you take my place, and I thought
that proceeding a masterpiece. You allowed me to dress you as a nun, and
with a compliance which proves your confidence in me you went to my
casino without knowing where you were going. As soon as you had landed,
the gondola came back, and I went to a place well known to our friend
from which, without being seen, I could follow all your movements and
hear everything you said. I was the author of the play; it was natural
that I should witness it, the more so that I felt certain of seeing and
hearing nothing that would not be very agreeable to me. I reached the
casino a quarter of an hour after you, and I cannot tell you my
delightful surprise when I saw that dear Pierrot who had amused us so
much, and whom we had not recognized. But I was fated to feel no other
pleasure than that of his appearance. Fear, surprise, and anxiety
overwhelmed me at once when I saw the effect produced upon him by the
disappointment of his expectation, and I felt unhappy. Our lover took the
thing wrongly, and he went away in despair; he loves me still, but if he
thinks of me it is only to try to forget me. Alas! he will succeed but
too soon! By sending back that key he proves that he will never again go
to the casino. Fatal night! When my only wish