complained.

"Shouldn't have arst me to sing," Bindle retorted. "Yer know I ain't a
bloomin' canary, like you and 'Earty."

To Mr. Hearty the visits of the Bindles took on a new and more alarming
aspect. Sunday was no day for secular things, and he dreaded his
brother-in-law's reminiscences and comments on "parsons," and his views
regarding religion. Sooner or later Bindle always managed to gather
the desultory threads into his own hands.

"Y' oughter been a parson, 'Earty," Bindle remarked pleasantly one
Sunday evening apropos nothing. "So ought Ginger, if 'is language
wasn't so 'ighly spiced. It's no good lookin' 'appy if you're a
parson. Looks as if yer makin' a meal o' the soup in case the fish
ain't fresh.

"I remember movin' a parson once," remarked Bindle, puffing away
contentedly at a cigar he had brought with him (Mr. Hearty did not
smoke), now thoroughly well-launched upon a conversational monologue.
"Leastways 'e was a missionary. 'E was due somewhere in Africa to
teach niggers 'ow uncomfortable it is to 'ave a soul.

"'E 'ad to go miles into the jungle, and all 'is stuff 'ad to be
carried on the 'eads of niggers. Forty pounds a man, and the nigger
a-standin' by to see it weighed, an' refusin' to budge if it was a
ounce overweight. I never knew niggers was so cute. This missionary
was allowed about ten bundles o' forty pounds each. Lord! yer should
'ave seen the collection of stuff 'e'd got. About four ton. The
manager worked it out that about two 'undred niggers 'ud be wanted.

"'E 'ad 'is double-bed; the top itself weighed seventy pounds. Wot a
missionary wants with a double-bed in the jungle does me. 'E gave up
the bedstead idea, an' 'e give it to me instead o' beer money. That's
'ow Mrs. B. comes to sleep in a missionary's bed. 'E stuck to a
grandfather clock, though. Nothink could persuade 'im to leave it
be'ind. The clock and weights was too much for one nigger, so I put
the weights in wi' the tea-things."

"Oh, Uncle Joe!" from Millie.

"Yes, 'e's got the time in the jungle, but if 'e wants 'is tea 'e'll
'ave to drink it out of 'is boot. Them weights must 'ave made an 'oly
mess of the crockery!"

At this juncture Mr. Hearty made a valiant effort to divert the
conversation to the forthcoming missionary tea; but Bindle was too
strong for him.

"There was one parson," he continued, "'oo was different from the
others. 'E was a big gun. I moved 'im when 'e was made a dean.