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s they equally would dwell. IT happened, one of them so nicely played, The fav'rite lass produced a little maid, Which both extolled, and each his own believed, Though doubtless one or t'other was deceived. BUT when to riper years the bantling grew, And sought her mother's foot-steps to pursue, Each friend desired to be her chosen swain, And neither would a parent's name retain. SAID one, why brother, she's your very shade; The features are the same-:-your looks pervade. Oh no, the other cried, it cannot be Her chin, mouth, nose, and eyes, with your's agree; But that as 'twill, let me her favours win, And for the pleasure I will risk the sin. THE COUNTRY JUSTICE TWO lawyers to their cause so well adhered, A country justice quite confused appeared, By them the facts were rendered so obscure With which the truth remained he was not sure. At length, completely tired, two straws he sought Of diff'rent lengths, and to the parties brought. These in his hand he held:--the plaintiff drew (So fate decreed) the shortest of the two. On this the other homeward took his way, To boast how nicely he had gained the day. THE bench complained: the magistrate replied Don't blame I pray--'tis nothing new I've tried; Courts often judge at hazard in the law, Without deciding by the longest straw. ALICE SICK SICK, Alice grown, and fearing dire event, Some friend advised a servant should be sent Her confessor to bring and ease her mind;-- Yes, she replied, to see him I'm inclined; Let father Andrew instantly be sought:-- By him salvation usually I'm taught. A MESSENGER was told, without delay, To take, with rapid steps, the convent way; He rang the bell--a monk enquired his name, And asked for what, or whom, the fellow came. I father Andrew want, the wight replied, Who's oft to Alice confessor and guide: With Andrew, cried the other, would you speak? If that's the case, he's far enough to seek; Poor man! he's left us for the
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