ut I can give my life and all my strength. I can give all
I can give."

"But how? How can you help it--help things like that massacre?"

"I can do my utmost to find out what is wrong with my world and rule it
and set it right."

"YOU! Alone."

"Other men do as much. Every one who does so helps others to do so. You
see--... In this world one may wake in the night and one may resolve to
be a king, and directly one has resolved one is a king. Does that sound
foolishness to you? Anyhow, it's fair that I should tell you, though
you count me a fool. This--this kingship--this dream of the night--is
my life. It is the very core of me. Much more than you are. More than
anything else can be. I mean to be a king in this earth. KING. I'm not
mad.... I see the world staggering from misery to misery and there is
little wisdom, less rule, folly, prejudice, limitation, the good things
come by chance and the evil things recover and slay them, and it is my
world and I am responsible. Every man to whom this light has come
is responsible. As soon as this light comes to you, as soon as your
kingship is plain to you, there is no more rest, no peace, no delight,
except in work, in service, in utmost effort. As far as I can do it I
will rule my world. I cannot abide in this smug city, I cannot
endure its self-complacency, its routine, its gloss of success, its
rottenness.... I shall do little, perhaps I shall do nothing, but what I
can understand and what I can do I will do. Think of that wild beautiful
country we saw, and the mean misery, the filth and the warring cruelty
of the life that lives there, tragedy, tragedy without dignity; and
think, too, of the limitless ugliness here, and of Russia slipping
from disorder to massacre, and China, that sea of human beings,
sliding steadily to disaster. Do you think these are only things in the
newspapers? To me at any rate they are not things in newspapers; they
are pain and failure, they are torment, they are blood and dust and
misery. They haunt me day and night. Even if it is utterly absurd I will
still do my utmost. It IS absurd. I'm a madman and you and my mother
are sensible people.... And I will go my way.... I don't care for the
absurdity. I don't care a rap."

He stopped abruptly.

"There you have it, Amanda. It's rant, perhaps. Sometimes I feel it's
rant. And yet it's the breath of life to me.... There you are.... At
last I've been able to break silence and tell you...."

He stop