ne thing more than another that makes a girl look ugly it
is stooping. I often tell her that when she gets a little older she'll
be quite frightful. Well, you are a quiz!'

Mr. Tupman had no objection to earning the reputation at so cheap a
rate: so he looked very knowing, and smiled mysteriously.

'What a sarcastic smile,' said the admiring Rachael; 'I declare I'm
quite afraid of you.'

'Afraid of me!'

'Oh, you can't disguise anything from me--I know what that smile means
very well.'

'What?' said Mr. Tupman, who had not the slightest notion himself.

'You mean,' said the amiable aunt, sinking her voice still lower--'you
mean, that you don't think Isabella's stooping is as bad as Emily's
boldness. Well, she is bold! You cannot think how wretched it makes me
sometimes--I'm sure I cry about it for hours together--my dear brother
is SO good, and so unsuspicious, that he never sees it; if he did, I'm
quite certain it would break his heart. I wish I could think it was only
manner--I hope it may be--' (Here the affectionate relative heaved a
deep sigh, and shook her head despondingly).

'I'm sure aunt's talking about us,' whispered Miss Emily Wardle to her
sister--'I'm quite certain of it--she looks so malicious.'

'Is she?' replied Isabella.--'Hem! aunt, dear!'

'Yes, my dear love!'

'I'm SO afraid you'll catch cold, aunt--have a silk handkerchief to
tie round your dear old head--you really should take care of
yourself--consider your age!'

However well deserved this piece of retaliation might have been, it was
as vindictive a one as could well have been resorted to. There is no
guessing in what form of reply the aunt's indignation would have vented
itself, had not Mr. Wardle unconsciously changed the subject, by calling
emphatically for Joe.

'Damn that boy,' said the old gentleman, 'he's gone to sleep again.'

'Very extraordinary boy, that,' said Mr. Pickwick; 'does he always sleep
in this way?'

'Sleep!' said the old gentleman, 'he's always asleep. Goes on errands
fast asleep, and snores as he waits at table.'

'How very odd!' said Mr. Pickwick.

'Ah! odd indeed,' returned the old gentleman; 'I'm proud of that
boy--wouldn't part with him on any account--he's a natural curiosity!
Here, Joe--Joe--take these things away, and open another bottle--d'ye
hear?'

The fat boy rose, opened his eyes, swallowed the huge piece of pie he
had been in the act of masticating when he last fell asleep, and slowly
ob