Arcy, by all that was wonderful!

There he was, with his monocle riveted in his right eye, between the
frown of his eyebrow and the chubby fatness of his cheek, with the
bored expression of one who saw no reason for the necessity of the
fatigue which caused the undignified beads of perspiration to assemble
on an otherwise unruffled countenance. A pair of kid gloves, buttoned
together, were hanging from the belt of his Sam Brown, and four inches
of a blue-bordered silk handkerchief dangled from his sleeve. As he
approached he half carried on his arm and half dragged along the
ground, the burden that was known as his full marching order.

"Hello, Septimus!" I said, as he came along, dragging his things
behind him.

"Ah! Hellow! Well, I'm demned! Never expected to find you here;
awfully glad to meet you again."

"What are you doing here?"

"I'll be demned if I know! Uninteresting spot this--what?"

"Well, what have you come here for?"

"Nothing much. I saw a fellow in that big dugout in the valley, and he
told me to report to you. The fact is, you know, you are attached to
me, or I'm attached to you, or something of that sort."

"Well, you are not in Havre now; there are snipers about, and if you
stand up there like that, you'll get hit."

"You don't mean to say so; that seems perfectly safe."

"Well, get down, and don't be a fool."

He carefully got down into the trench, leaving his equipment behind,
probably hoping it would get lost, and we entered the dugout.

"I must tell you, captain, I am horribly fatigued. I came through the
guns; very interesting and all that, but it's made my head ache."

"Have some water. It's rather muddy, but better than nothing these
days."

"No, thanks; doctor warned me against drinking dirty water; dysentery
and all that, don't you know. Any whisky and soda?"

"Look here, Septimus, now you are here, you must drop that nonsense."

"All right, old thing. I rather doubted the soda, but thank Heaven
I've got a flask; a sort of emergency ration. Help yourself and let's
drink it neat."

"How long have you been in the army, Septimus?"

"Three months. Why?"

"Like it?"

"Not bad. Saluting seems rather absurd; but it seems to please some. I
longed to come out; thought it would be interesting and all that sort
of thing. But so far I've had nothing to do but get from place to
place, carrying a beastly load with me."

"Probably your own fault. I have never seen a pack or haver