he meanness and gross selfishness of such a life:
and if you were never to let me see you again, I believe I could not
fall back into the delusion. But if you will be the guide of my life--"
Margaret sighed deeply. Even at this moment of vital happiness, her
thoughts rested on her sister. She remembered what Hester's
anticipations had been, in prospect of having Edward for the guide of
her life.
"I frighten you, I see," said Philip, "with my confessions; but, be the
consequences what they may, I must speak, Margaret. If you despise me,
I must do you the justice, and give myself the consolation, of
acknowledging what I have been, and what I owe to you."
"It is not that," said Margaret. "Let the past go. Let it be forgotten
in reaching forward to better things. But do not let us be confident
about the future. I have seen too much of that. We must not provide
for disappointment. Let us leave it till it comes. Surely," she added,
with a gentle smile, "we have enough for the present. I cannot look
forward yet."
"How you must have suffered!" cried Philip, in a tone of grief. "You
have lost some of your confidence, love. You did not cling to the
present, and shrink from the future when... Oh, it is bitter, even now,
to think, that while I was working on, in hope and resolution, you were
suffering here, making it a duty to extinguish your regard for me, I all
the time toiling to deserve it--and there was no one to set us right,
and the whole world in league to divide us."
"That is all over now."
"But not the consequences, Margaret. They have shaken you: they have
made you know doubt and fear."
"We are both changed, Philip. We are older, and I trust it will appear
that we are wiser than we were. Yes, older. There are times in one's
life when days do the work of years and our days have been of that kind.
You have discovered a new life, and my wishes and expectations are much
altered. They may not be fewer, or less bright, but they are very
different."
"If they were pure from fears--"
"They are pure from fears. At this moment I can fear nothing. We have
been brought together by the unquestionable Providence which rules our
lives; and this is enough. The present is all right; and the future,
which is to come out of it, will be all right in its way. I have no
fear--but I do not want to anticipate. This hour with its
satisfactions, is all that I can bear."
Notwithstanding this, and Phil
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