nded upside down on the floor, whereupon he lifted up his voice, and
the concert grew lively. I took him under one arm, so, and laid Missy
over my shoulder, and it struck me I would join the chorus in self
defence, so I opened with all my might on 'Hold the Fort'; but great
Tecumseh! I only insulted them both, and finding my fifth fiddle was
nowhere in the fray, I feared Jarvis would hear the howling and ring
the alarm bell, so I just sat down. I spread out Dick in a soft place,
where he could not bump his brains out, and laying my lady across my
lap, I held her down by main force, while she screamed till she was
black in the face. If you had not come just when you did, I should have
turned gray and cross-eyed. Hello, Missy! If she is not cooing and
laughing! Little vixen! Oh! but--'lambs'!--I believe they are!
Hereafter tend your own flock; and in preference I will herd young
panthers."

He wiped his forehead where the perspiration stood in drops, and
watched with amazement the sudden lull in the tempest.

Clasped in her mother's arms, the baby smiled and gurgled, and Dick,
drying his eyes on the maternal bosom, showed the exact spot where she
must kiss his bruised head.

"Ned, what have you done? This baby's hair is dripping wet, and so is
the neck of her dress."

"Serves her right, too. I sprinkled her, that's all."

"Sprinkled her! Have you lost your senses?"

"Shouldn't wonder if I had; people in bedlam are apt to be crazy. Yes,
I sprinkled Missy, because she turned so black in the face, I thought
she was strangling; and my step-mother always sprinkled me when I had a
fit of tantrums. But let me tell you, Missy will never be a zealous
Baptist, she doesn't take to water kindly."

"When I want my children step-mothered I will let you know. Give me
that towel, and baby's woollen cap hanging on the knob of the bureau.
Bless her precious heart! if she does not keep you up all night, with
the croup, you may thank your stars."

"Susie, just tell me how you tame them, so that next time--"

"Next time, sir, I shall not trust you. I just love them, and they know
it; that is what tames the whole world."

Edward Singleton stooped over his wife, and kissed her rosy cheek.

"Little woman, what luck had you in No. 19?"

"The best I could wish. I have saved that poor girl from brain-fever, I
hope."

"How did you manage it?"

"Just simply because I am a flesh and blood woman, and not a
blundering, cast-iron man."