stood at the right. Between them, hand in hand once more, passed
Gwendolyn and the Man-Who-Makes-Faces.

The Piper came next. "Call that a' English tongue?" he asked, with an
impudent grin at the soldier's shining weapon.

"Yes, sir."

"Pah!"

Now Thomas gave Jane a quick shove forward--but a shove which sent her
only as far as the Gate.

The King's English stared down at her. "How are you?" he said coldly.

"I'm awful uncomfortable," was the mournful answer.

"Then take off your stays," he advised. Whereat the polished tongue
glanced through the light, caught Jane fairly around the waist, and
with a swift recoil brought her to her feet!

And now Gwendolyn, astonished, saw that too much laughter had again
remolded that sateen bulk. The nurse had grown woefully heavy about the
shoulders--which put a fearful strain on the stitches of her bodice! and
gave her the appearance of a gigantic humming-top! As she swayed a
moment on her wide-toed shoes--shoes now utterly lacking buttons--the
King's English again struck out, caught her, this time, around the neck,
and sent her spinning through the Gate!

"_Zing-g-g-g!_" she laughed dizzily--that laugh the high, persistent
note of a top!

Thomas attempted to follow. "I just _will_ come in," he cried, wielding
his warped weapon with a flourish.

"You shall _not!_" To bar the way, the King's English thrust out his
polished tongue.

"I _will!_" _Crack! Crack!_

"You won't!" _Crack! Crack!_

The fight was on! For the combatants, tongue's-length from each other,
were prowling to and fro menacingly.

"Oh, there's going to be a tongue-lashing," cried Gwendolyn, frightened.

"I'm the King's Hinglish!"--it was the soldier's slogan.

"This is me!" sang Thomas, saucily flicking at a brass button. His face
was all cunning.

Then how the tongues popped!

"This is I!" corrected the King's English promptly. But his face got a
trifle more florid.

"Steady!" counseled the little old gentleman.

"I'm hall right," the other cried back.

"Oh, Piper!" said Gwendolyn; "which side are _you_ on?"

The Piper shifted his tobacco pipe from one corner of his mouth to the
other. "I'm for the man that's got the _cash_," he declared.

There was no doubt about Jane's choice. Seeing Thomas's momentary
advantage, she came spinning close to the Gate. "Use h-words, Thomas!"
she hummed. "Use h-words!"

Thomas acted upon her advice. "Hack and hit and hammer!" he charged.
"Haggle and