If the chief feature of the earlier half of life is a never-satisfied
longing after happiness, the later half is characterized by the dread
of misfortune. For, as we advance in years, it becomes in a greater or
less degree clear that all happiness is chimerical in its nature,
and that pain alone is real. Accordingly, in later years, we, or, at
least, the more prudent amongst us, are more intent upon eliminating
what is painful from our lives and making our position secure, than on
the pursuit of positive pleasure. I may observe, by the way, that in
old age, we are better able to prevent misfortunes from coming, and in
youth better able to bear them when they come.
In my young days, I was always pleased to hear a ring at my door: ah!
thought I, now for something pleasant. But in later life my feelings
on such occasions were rather akin to dismay than to pleasure: heaven
help me! thought I, what am I to do? A similar revulsion of feeling in
regard to the world of men takes place in all persons of any talent
or distinction. For that very reason they cannot be said properly to
belong to the world; in a greater or less degree, according to the
extent of their superiority, they stand alone. In their youth they
have a sense of being abandoned by the world; but later on, they feel
as though they had escaped it. The earlier feeling is an unpleasant
one, and rests upon ignorance; the second is pleasurable--for in the
meantime they have come to know what the world is.
The consequence of this is that, as compared with the earlier, the
later half of life, like the second part of a musical period, has less
of passionate longing and more restfulness about it. And why is this
the case Simply because, in youth, a man fancies that there is a
prodigious amount of happiness and pleasure to be had in the world,
only that it is difficult to come by it; whereas, when he becomes
old, he knows that there is nothing of the kind; he makes his mind
completely at ease on the matter, enjoys the present hour as well as
he can, and even takes a pleasure in trifles.
The chief result gained by experience of life is _clearness of view_.
This is what distinguishes the man of mature age, and makes the world
wear such a different aspect from that which it presented in his youth
or boyhood. It is only then that he sees things quite plain, and takes
them for that which they really are: while in earlier years he saw a
phantom-world, put together out of
|