ft to myself, I
should hang a rogue and then write his apology and subscribe to a neat
monument, commemorating, not his virtues, but his misfortunes. I should,
perhaps, adorn the marble with emblems, as is the custom with regard to
the more regular and normally constituted members of society. It would
not be proper to put the image of a lamb upon the stone which marked the
resting-place of him of the private cemetery. But I would not hesitate
to place the effigy of a wolf or a hyena upon the monument. I do not
judge these animals, I only kill them or shut them up. I presume they
stand just as well with their Maker as lambs and kids, and the existence
of such beings is a perpetual plea for God Almighty's poor, yelling,
scalping Indians, his weasand-stopping Thugs, his despised felons, his
murdering miscreants, and all the unfortunates whom we, picked
individuals of a picked class of a picked race, scrubbed, combed, and
catechized from our cradles upward, undertake to find accommodations for
in another state of being where it is to be hoped they will have a better
chance than they had in this.

The Master paused, and took off his great round spectacles. I could not
help thinking that he looked benevolent enough to pardon Judas Iscariot
just at that moment, though his features can knot themselves up pretty,
formidably on occasion.

--You are somewhat of a phrenologist, I judge, by the way you talk of
instinctive and inherited tendencies--I said.

--They tell me I ought to be,--he answered, parrying my question, as I
thought.---I have had a famous chart made out of my cerebral organs,
according to which I ought to have been--something more than a poor
Magister Artaum.

--I thought a shade of regret deepened the lines on his broad,
antique-looking forehead, and I began talking about all the sights I had
seen in the way of monstrosities, of which I had a considerable list, as
you will see when I tell you my weakness in that direction. This, you
understand, Beloved, is private and confidential.

I pay my quarter of a dollar and go into all the side-shows that follow
the caravans and circuses round the country. I have made friends of all
the giants and all the dwarfs. I became acquainted with Monsieur Bihin,
le plus bel homme du monde, and one of the biggest, a great many years
ago, and have kept up my agreeable relations with him ever since. He is
a most interesting giant, with a softness of voice and tenderness