to our ancient constitution; but, however this be, his majesty
has determined to make use only of low heels in the administration of the
government, and all offices in the gift of the crown, as you cannot but
observe; and particularly that his majesty's imperial heels are lower at
least by a _drurr_ than any of his court (_drurr_ is a measure about the
fourteenth part of an inch). The animosities between these two parties
run so high, that they will neither eat, nor drink, nor talk with each
other. We compute the _Tramecksan_, or high heels, to exceed us in
number; but the power is wholly on our side. We apprehend his imperial
highness, the heir to the crown, to have some tendency towards the high
heels; at least we can plainly discover that one of his heels is higher
than the other, which gives him a hobble in his gait. Now, in the midst
of these intestine disquiets, we are threatened with an invasion from the
island of Blefuscu, which is the other great empire of the universe,
almost as large and powerful as this of his majesty. For as to what we
have heard you affirm, that there are other kingdoms and states in the
world inhabited by human creatures as large as yourself, our philosophers
are in much doubt, and would rather conjecture that you dropped from the
moon, or one of the stars; because it is certain, that a hundred mortals
of your bulk would in a short time destroy all the fruits and cattle of
his majesty's dominions: besides, our histories of six thousand moons
make no mention of any other regions than the two great empires of
Lilliput and Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers have, as I was going to
tell you, been engaged in a most obstinate war for six-and-thirty moons
past. It began upon the following occasion. It is allowed on all hands,
that the primitive way of breaking eggs, before we eat them, was upon the
larger end; but his present majesty's grandfather, while he was a boy,
going to eat an egg, and breaking it according to the ancient practice,
happened to cut one of his fingers. Whereupon the emperor his father
published an edict, commanding all his subjects, upon great penalties, to
break the smaller end of their eggs. The people so highly resented this
law, that our histories tell us, there have been six rebellions raised on
that account; wherein one emperor lost his life, and another his crown.
These civil commotions were constantly fomented by the monarchs of
Blefuscu; and when they were q