and if you try to
bribe him with a pair of ducks he'd give it against you even if you had
the best case in the world instead of the worst. That's the kind of man
he is."

Joyce sighed heavily. The ways of the law were proving unexpectedly
difficult and expensive.

"Maybe," he said, "I could send him two pair of ducks, or two pair and a
half, but that's the most I can do; and there won't be a young duck left
about the place if I send him that many."

"Either you act by my advice," said Mr. Madden, "or I'll drop your case.
This isn't a matter for the local bench of magistrates. If it was them
you were dealing with, ducks might be some use to you. But a County
Court Judge is a different kind of man altogether. He's a gentleman, and
he's honest. If you attempt to get at him with ducks or any other kind
of bribe you'll ruin any chance you have, which isn't much."

"That's a queer thing now, so it is," said Joyce.

"It's true all the same," said Mr. Madden.

"Do you mean to tell me," said Joyce, "that his honour, the judge, would
go against a man that had done him a good turn in the way of a pair of
ducks or the like?"

"That's exactly what I do mean," said Mr. Madden. "No judge would stand
it And the one who presides over this court would be even angrier than
most of them, so don't you do it."

Joyce left Mr. Madden's office a few minutes later, and tramped home.
In spite of the lawyer's discouraging view of the case he seemed fairly
well satisfied.

That evening he spoke to his wife.

"How many of them large white dukes have you?" he asked; "how many
that's fit to eat?"

"There's no more than six left out of the first clutch," said Mrs.
Joyce. "There was eleven hatched out, but sure the rats got the rest
of them." "I'd be glad," said Joyce, "if you'd fatten them six, and you
needn't spare the yellow meal. It'll be worth your while to have them as
good as you can."

A month later the case of Joyce v. Flanagan came on in the County Court.
Mr. Madden had hammered the original story of the wall, the heifer, the
pigs and the potatoes, into shape. It sounded almost plausible as Mr.
Madden told it in his opening remarks. But he had very little hopes
that it would survive the handling of Mr. Ellis, a young and intelligent
lawyer, who was acting for Flanagan. Joyce cheerfully confirmed
every detail of the story on oath. He was unshaken by Mr. Ellis'
cross-examination, chiefly because the judge constantly interfered