plied the boy with the fife.

"Fire the gun!" said the hangman.

The boy applied one end of the fife to his mouth, blew out all the
flour, and in this humble imitation of the smoke of a gun, poor puss
was run up to the batten, where she hung till she was dead. I am
ashamed to say I did not attempt to save the kitten's life, although I
caused her foul murder to be revenged by the _cat_.

After the body had hung a certain time, they took it down and buried
it in the shot-locker; this was an indictable offence, as the smell
would have proved, so I lodged the information; the body was found,
and as the facts were clear, the law took its course, to the great
amusement of the bystanders, who saw the brats tied upon a gun, and
well flogged.

The boatswain ate the kitten, first, he said, because he had
"_larned_" to eat cats in Spain; secondly, because she had _not_ died
a natural death (I thought otherwise); and his last reason was more
singular than either of the others: he had seen a picture in a church
in Spain, of Peter's vision of the animals let down in the sheet, and
there was a cat among them. Observing an alarm of scepticism in my
eye, he thought proper to confirm his assertion with an oath.

"Might it not have been a rabbit?" said I.

"Rabbit, sir; d----n me, think I didn't know a cat from a rabbit? Why
one has got short ears and long tail, and t'other has got _wicee
wersee_, as we calls it."

A grand carnival masquerade was to be given at Minorca in honour of
the English, and the place chosen for the exhibition was a church; all
which was perfectly consistent with the Romish faith. I went in the
character of a fool, and met many brother officers there. It was a
comical sight to see the anomalous groups stared at by the pictures of
the Virgin Mary and all the saints, whose shrines were lit up for the
occasion with wax tapers. The admiral, rear-admiral, and most of the
captains and officers of the fleet were present; the place was about a
mile from the town.

Having hired a fool's dress, I mounted that very appropriate animal--a
donkey, and set off amidst the shouts of a thousand dirty vagabonds.
On my arrival, I began to show off in somersaults, leaps, and all
kinds of practical jokes. The manner in which I supported the
character drew a little crowd around me. I never spoke to an admiral
or captain unless he addressed me first; and then I generally sold him
a bargain. Being very well acquainted with the do