in the world's eye.
"Yet, as I have said, I should be best pleased, at least for the present,
to live under the same roof with you. When the fever of my young life is
spent; when placid age shall tame the vulture that devours me, friendship
may come, love and hope being dead. May this be true? Can my soul,
inextricably linked to this perishable frame, become lethargic and cold,
even as this sensitive mechanism shall lose its youthful elasticity? Then,
with lack-lustre eyes, grey hairs, and wrinkled brow, though now the words
sound hollow and meaningless, then, tottering on the grave's extreme edge,
I may be--your affectionate and true friend,
"PERDITA."
Raymond's answer was brief. What indeed could he reply to her complaints,
to her griefs which she jealously paled round, keeping out all thought of
remedy. "Notwithstanding your bitter letter," he wrote, "for bitter I must
call it, you are the chief person in my estimation, and it is your
happiness that I would principally consult. Do that which seems best to
you: and if you can receive gratification from one mode of life in
preference to another, do not let me be any obstacle. I foresee that the
plan which you mark out in your letter will not endure long; but you are
mistress of yourself, and it is my sincere wish to contribute as far as you
will permit me to your happiness."
"Raymond has prophesied well," said Perdita, "alas, that it should be so!
our present mode of life cannot continue long, yet I will not be the first
to propose alteration. He beholds in me one whom he has injured even unto
death; and I derive no hope from his kindness; no change can possibly be
brought about even by his best intentions. As well might Cleopatra have
worn as an ornament the vinegar which contained her dissolved pearl, as I
be content with the love that Raymond can now offer me."
I own that I did not see her misfortune with the same eyes as Perdita. At
all events methought that the wound could be healed; and, if they remained
together, it would be so. I endeavoured therefore to sooth and soften her
mind; and it was not until after many endeavours that I gave up the task as
impracticable. Perdita listened to me impatiently, and answered with some
asperity:--"Do you think that any of your arguments are new to me? or
that my own burning wishes and intense anguish have not suggested them all
a thousand times, with far more eagerness and subtlety than you can put
into them? Lionel
|