arkably fine young man, to whom his friends were not in
the least attached, departed on the perilous enterprise. He ascended
eleven staircases, descended fourteen, and, having gone backwards and
forwards through twenty-two of the passages which come from nowhere and
lead to nothing, in this most wonderfully constructed building, he made
the appalling discovery that he had lost his way.

With the true Anglo-Saxon courage, he continued to explore undauntedly,
and at one period went down deep into the bowels of the earth, where,
far above his head, he could distinctly hear the trampling of feet, and
where, in the darkness, he stumbled upon certain whitish objects which
may have been either the skeletons of other lost travellers, or else
property busts and statues. At length, overcome by terror and thirst, he
rushed upwards, and continued to mount until he reached the dizzy height
where the air was so intensely rarified as to smell of oranges and
gingerbeer, and where, he states, he could distinctly hear the voice of
MR. GUSTAVUS BROOKE recommending MISS FEATHERSTONE to go to a nunnery.
His sufferings at this period were most acute, and his despairing
efforts to open every door he saw were agonizing.

Retracing his steps, he explored every lonely passage, dusty avenue, and
dark staircase in vain, and finally he conceived the daring resolution
of setting the theatre on fire, in the hope that assistance might thus
be summoned, but was prevented by the want of material. At one time he
says that he heard female voices, and immediately addressed to the
speaker those imploring accents to which woman never listens unmoved;
but his words were flung back to him by the echoes with an injurious
addition of something sounding like "Tipsy, I suppose." At last, fairly
overcome, he sat down upon an extremely dirty couch, and resigned
himself to his fate. How many dreadful hours thus passed he knows not,
but on returning to consciousness he found himself among kind faces, and
being carried over to the nearest tavern he was subjected to a course of
restoratives, including alcohol and nicotine, and was finally able to
walk home with some straightness. It is hoped that this will be a
warning, and inasmuch as proper guides can always be obtained for a
shilling, there is really no excuse for running so terrible a risk as
that of trying to leave the private boxes of Drury Lane without
assistance.

* * * * *

TH