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Title: Bedridden and The Winter Offensive
Deep Waters, Part 8.

Author: W.W. Jacobs

Release Date: March 6, 2004 [EBook #11478]

Language: English

Character set encoding: US-ASCII

*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK BEDRIDDEN AND THE WINTER OFFENSIVE ***

Produced by David Widger

DEEP WATERS

By W.W. JACOBS

CONTENTS:
BEDRIDDEN
THE WINTER OFFENSIVE

BEDRIDDEN

July 12, 1915.--Disquieting rumours to the effect that epidemic of
Billetitis hitherto confined to the north of King's Road shows signs of
spreading.

July 14.--Report that two Inns of Court men have been seen peeping over
my gate.

July 16.--Informed that soldier of agreeable appearance and charming
manners requests interview with me. Took a dose of Phospherine and went.
Found composite photograph of French, Joffre, and Hindenburg waiting for
me in the hall. Smiled (he did, I mean) and gave me the mutilated form
of salute reserved for civilians. Introduced himself as Quartermaster-
Sergeant Beddem, and stated that the Inns of Court O.T.C. was going
under canvas next week. After which he gulped. Meantime could I take in
a billet. Questioned as to what day the corps was going into camp said
that he believed it was Monday, but was not quite sure--might possibly be
Tuesday. Swallowed again and coughed a little. Accepted billet and felt
completely re-warded by smile. Q.M.S. bade me good-bye, and then with
the air of a man suddenly remembering something, asked me whether I could
take two. Excused myself and interviewed my C.O. behind the dining-room
door. Came back and accepted. Q.M.S. so overjoyed (apparently) that he
fell over the scraper. Seemed to jog his memory. He paused, and gazing
in absent fashion at the topmost rose on the climber in the porch, asked
whether I could take three! Added hopefully that the third was only a
boy. Excused myself. Heated debate with C.O. Subject: sheets.
Returned with me to explain to the Q.M.S. He smiled. C.O. accepted at
once, and, returning smile, expressed regret at size and position of
bedrooms available. Q.M.S. went off swi