more because Sarah,[45] when I tell her to take a bottle away that has
a mixture in it which I don't like, looks me full in the face, and
says "she _won't_, because I may want it." I submit, because it is
so nice to get Sarah to look one full in the face. She really is the
prettiest, round faced, and round eyed girl I ever saw, and it's a
great shame she should be a housemaid; only I wish she would take
those bottles away. She says I'm looking better to-day, and I think
I'm feeling a little bit more,--no, I mean, a little bit less
demoniacal. But I still can do that jackdaw beautifully.

[Footnote 45: Our Herne Hill parlor-maid for four years. One of quite
the brightest and handsomest types of English beauty I ever saw,
either in life, or fancied in painting.--J. R.]

* * * * *

I am quite sure you would have felt like Albert Duerer, had you gone on
painting wrens.

The way Nature and Heaven waste the gifts and souls they give and
make, passes all wonder. You might have done anything you chose, only
you were too modest.

No, I never _will_ call you my dear lady; certainly, if it comes to
that, something too dreadful will follow.

* * * * *

I am most interested in your criticism of "Queen Mary." I have not
read it, but the choice of subject is entirely morbid and wrong, and I
am sure all you say must be true. The form of decline which always
comes on mental power of Tennyson's passionately sensual character, is
always of seeing ugly things, a kind of delirium tremens. Turner had
it fatally in his last years.

I am so glad you enjoy writing to me more than any one else. The book
you sent me of Dr. John Brown's on books, has been of extreme utility
to me, and contains matter of the deepest interest. Did you read it
yourself? If not I must lend it to you.

I am so glad also to know of your happiness in Chaucer. Don't hurry in
reading. I will get you an edition for your own, that you may mark it
in peace.

* * * * *

I send you two books, neither I fear very amusing, but on my word, I
think books are always dull when one really most wants them. No, other
people don't feel it as you and I do, nor do the dogs and ponies, but
oughtn't we to be thankful that we _do_ feel it. The thing I fancy we
are both wanting in, is a right power of enjoying the past. What
sunshine there _has_ been even in this sad year! I have seen beau