apparent
coercion, or a sacrifice of truth or honor, depends upon the successful
qualities that go toward the building up of a complete and harmonious
personality. It is an axiom in psychology that to attain the highest
success, one must first understand, and, understanding, conquer the bad,
and develop the good features in one's own temperament, before
attempting to rule the conduct of any other person. You must understand
yourself before you attempt to understand your husband. Many of his best
qualities,--qualities that if rightly understood, will go a long way
toward making your life a happy one,--can be misunderstood,
misinterpreted, and become incessant factors for doubt, jealousy and
quarreling.

Because your husband prefers to do a thing in a way that does not quite
satisfy your taste, does not necessarily mean that he is wrong, and such
a condition does not justify an argument. Consider the matter seriously,
in silence argue it out with yourself and give his side the same justice
you hope to get. If you can develop convincing proofs, that his way is
not the best way, even though it isn't really wrong ethically, he will
probably concede the point, provided,--and don't overlook this,--you "go
about it in the right way, and in the right spirit." It isn't likely you
will be given a patient hearing, if in the past you have been in the
habit of nagging and browbeating him. Don't look upon tactful ways of
gaining your point as evidence of weakness. It is distinctly an evidence
of strength of character, and, each time you win a point in a friendly
debate with your husband, you will have gained much. He will respect you
all the more because of your justice; and will secretly admire you
because of your ability to protect yourself. You will gain confidence in
your judgment, and you will see things in a broader, and from a less
selfish standpoint.

YOUR HUSBAND'S FRIENDS SHOULD BE YOUR FRIENDS.--Be sure your husband's
friends are your friends. Business or professional exigencies do not
always permit a man to choose or select his acquaintances. You can be
sure, however, he will not ask or expect you to associate with any
doubtful person, though it may be necessary to extend a welcome to an
undesirable business, or professional associate, for the time being.
When these occasions occur, do not mar the opportunity to help by any
exhibition of temper, or dissatisfaction. He may be trying to make the
best of an unfortunate inci