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Project Gutenberg's Good Stories from the Ladies Home Journal, by Various This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net Title: Good Stories from The Ladies Home Journal Author: Various Release Date: July 7, 2004 [EBook #12836] Language: English Character set encoding: ASCII *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GOOD STORIES *** Produced by Al Haines GOOD STORIES REPRINTED FROM THE LADIES' HOME JOURNAL OF PHILADELPHIA 1907 GOOD STORIES from THE LADIES' HOME JOURNAL _Warding Off a Catastrophe_ A fat woman entered a crowded street car and, seizing a strap, stood directly in front of a man seated in the corner. As the car started she lunged against his newspaper and at the same time trod heavily on his toes. As soon as he could extricate himself he rose and offered her his seat. "You are very kind, sir," she said, panting for breath. "Not at all, madam," he replied; "it's not kindness; it's simply self-defense." _Not What She Expected_ A charming, well-preserved widow had been courted and won by a physician. She had children. The wedding-day was approaching, and it was time the children should know they were to have a new father. Calling one of them to her she said: "Georgie, I am going to do something before long that I would like to talk about with you." "What is it, Ma ?" aiked the boy. "I am intending to marry Doctor Jones in a few days, and----" "Bully for you. Ma, Does Doctor Jones know it ?" _Of Course_ The morning class had been duly instructed and enlightened upon the subject of our national independence. Feeling sure she had made a real and lasting impression with her explanations and blackboard illustrations the young teacher began with the usual round of questions: "Now, Sammy Smith, where was the Declaration of Independence signed?" Sammy, with a shout of glee: "At de bottom, ma'am--that's what you said!" _He Had Certainly Met Him_ A traveler going to New Zealand was asked by a friend if he would inquire, while there, as to the whereabouts of the friend's grandfather, Jeremiah Thompson. "Certainly," said the traveler, and wherever he went he asked for news of the ancestor, but withou
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